Zippidy Doo Da

I'm not stupid, I'm from Texas!

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Mmmmm.... Donuts!

I saw a billboard celebrating Shipley's Donuts 70 years in Houston. I was happy to see they ran Krispy Kreme out of town. The Shipley donut is an honest and unpretentious confection. They are packed closely in the typically sized donut box, so closely that you are likely to get a bit of chocolate covering sticking to your plain glazed, or some jelly filling oozing onto your sugar donut. These boxes make it easy for people to stack a few boxes under their arms to ply clients with workplace breakfast treats. There is nothing like a gooey hot Shipley's donut, no matter what people say about health matters, the occaisonal donut is necessary to one's mental health. The Krispy Kreme, on the other hand, is a sassy little number, individually placed in large thin boxes so not one donut touches the other. I think this hurts Krispy Kreme sales in this part of the country. It's hard to put those long thin donut boxes under your arm, feeling as you have to keep them level in order not to disturb the regal pastries resting inside. They are presented like something that should be served at high tea in the afternoon, not with bitter hot black office coffee in the morning. The term "gourmet donut" comes to mind, but this is surely an oxymoron. They are not lumpy and charming like your grandmother, they are as smooth, uniform and polished as a young professional couple fresh out of graduate school. I never trust a salesman bearing Krispy Kreme donuts. I have seen Krispy Kreme donuts in production as well. The shops are automated and you can see the donuts in formation on a conveyor belt getting covered with sickly sweet icing that turns crisp when it cools down, hence the name Krispy Kreme, I think. Donuts should not be manufactured.
Thank you Shipley's, for 70 years of honest, unpretentious, down to earth donuts, and thanks also for ousting a company that caters to the type of people that believe donuts can be made into a polite and prestigious gourmet treat.


At 5:34 PM , Anonymous Jokahontas said...

Hey now, I love Krispy Kreme donuts. I love the way the glaze is so thick, smooth and sweet, and I love the way the dough is so light and delicious. What’s wrong with the shape of a box? Why not just carry the boxes like a pizza? No one complains about the shape of a pizza box. The reason the donuts are put in a flat box is to not disturb the even coat of icing. Just because a donut is “manufactured” to be delicious and beautiful does not mean that it is a snobby or sassy donut, it is just a donut. And about that “gourmet” offense, what’s wrong with a donut that can be dressed up? I always ate Krispy Kreme donuts with them all over my face and hands – the same way I eat Shipley or any other brand of donut. Maybe when Krispy Kreme returns to Houston (which they will, so Shipley’s fans should just enjoy gloating while they can) their donuts will be versatile enough to be eaten anywhere from cars to weddings. – Jokahontas daughter of the Chief

At 2:16 PM , Blogger liquiddaddy said...

I think I can resolve this without head-butting or face-shooting:

Shipley's = Donuts

Krispy Kreme = Doughnuts*

I am a "donut" man.



*because of their effete elitist political correctness.

At 7:01 AM , Blogger Nails said...

Nice rebuttal, j. My wife, a sassy little number in her own right, is partial to the Krispy Kreme. I love her anyway.


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