Chupacabra Files:

To: The Hon. Rep Frank Courte Jr,
From: The Hon. Chas. Hoarse
Subject: Proposed Legislation:
Date: Feb 14, 2007

Rep. Courte, I would like to bring your attention to the threat posed to our society by designer pharmaceuticals that encourage licentious behavior. For some reason beyond me, drug manufacturers are marketing products designed to propagate fornication and philandering.

I am asking you to take up this cause, and introduce legislation in the Texas House to educate, and thereby protect, the public from this scourge. Since prescription drugs are dispensed through pharmacies, I am directing this action to these locations. This new law, when enacted would require the pharmacy to post a sign at the counter, no smaller than 300 square inches, explaining the health, social, and moral costs of using these drugs.

Furthermore, the law would require that the pharmacist read this statement aloud to the “patient” and at least one witness, before such drugs could be dispensed. It is my belief that these measures would shame those who use these drugs recreationally,
substantially reducing the use of Viagara and Cialis, bringing about a quick reduction in yuckiness in our society.

Note that I have not included the drug Alprostadil on this list of similar acting drugs, as this one is injected directly into the penis. Sounds like punishment enough, eh?