Zippidy Doo Da

I'm not stupid, I'm from Texas!

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Frothy Quits

Rick Santorum ducked-out of the race for the GOP presidential nomination today, facing the fact that the Pennsylvania voters, those who know him best, were lined-up to vote against him in their primary election on April 24th. Santorum lost his bid for re-election to his Senate seat there in 2006 after questions about his sweetheart deals for multiple home mortgages, his dispute with the State of Pennsylvania after they billed him for over $100,000.00 in costs to home-school his children after he moved his family to Washington, and his part in Jack Abramoff’s “K Street Project,” including his efforts to grant “Made in USA” status to Chinese sweatshops on the island of Saipan.

This clears the field for perennial loser Ron Paul, who after this failed campaign, will no doubt pass the torch to his son Senator Ayn Rand Paul to tap the wacky libertarian moneybag and unreconstructed Bircher community.

Newt Gingrich too will carry on, though the profit margin on his campaign is eroding, prompting him to charge $50.00 a pop for people to listen to him. He is now negotiating a joint venture with Premier Election Solutions, formerly Diebold Election Systems, to automatically charge voters who select him.

Now comes an historic opportunity for the American people to show how broad-minded they’ve become. When John Kennedy ran in 1960, some questioned whether a Catholic could be elected. When Nelson Rockefeller, the original ‘Rockefeller Republican’ got divorced, consensus was that his White House dreams were over, and they were, as Gerald Ford avoided fatal golf injuries during his time in office but Ronnie Reagan soon broke through that barrier. And Barack Obama in 2008 became the first black American to be elected president. This year, Willard Romney will prove that today, even a near-billionaire can win his party’s nomination for the highest office in the land.


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